November 20, 2009

New Moon

And. . . . I went to see New Moon tonight. You couldn't have expected anything less. This will be the nineteenth post I've written that references Twilight in one way or another (and that doesn't count the quarterly or yearly recap reading recap posts). I have embraced my Twilight nerd status. Ask to see my tattoo some time.

First off, you all know I am ultra-ultra Team Jacob. Last year, when I reread the books, after finishing Eclipse again, I walked around in a fog of despair in Kohl's because I was just so depressed for Jacob. So yeah. I came into it with some biases.

But the movies? Make me even more Team Jacob. After watching New Moon, I'm pretty certain the producers are too. I mean, here we have Jacob marching around for several scenes with no shirt on, and he looks mighty good without a shirt on. Then, Edward pulls his shirt off in Italy. He's all pasty and hairy and nothing compared to Jacob's six-pack. It's like taking candy from a baby; how could you NOT love Jacob more? Of the seven girls I went with, three or four of them said they'd totally switched to Jacob's side (as well they should have). I'm not complaining. The movie of Eclipse will probably kill me, what with the total heart-breaking rejection of Jacob.

Also, Edward? Lipstick or no lipstick. You've gotta stick with one or the other; none of this bouncing back and forth between the two. It's ludicrous. I can't take my eyes off your lips. And not in a good way. More in a "hmm, does he have lipstick on his teeth?" kind of way. Maybe not what you're going for.

Last time, I had low hopes for the movie, and it exceeded them (at least for the first viewing). This time, though, I had pretty high expectations, and it was still FAR better than I'd expected. It didn't have that same "shot with a home video camera" feel and I felt like the cheese was waaaaaay toned down.

Jacob just saved the movie for me. He translates better from the book to the screen than any other character, I think (Kayla reminds me, rightly, that Charlie is also spot on. Oh, how I love him too. He couldn't be better).  Jacob is so perfectly sweet and simultaneously snarky. I'm so so thrilled they didn't recast Jacob - I don't think anyone could possibly have played him better. It's even possible that this movie will help my misguided mother and sisters see the error of their ways and turn to the light (not that I'm holding my breath). From the screaming in the movie theater, it certainly seemed like most of the theater tonight was on Jacob's side.

My real problem, of course, the one that I'll never fully be able to get over as a movie viewer, is that Robert Pattinson is just not good-looking. Why did they not cast someone else?! I would have been happy to make suggestions, had anyone bothered to call for my opinion (shockingly, no one did).

Frankly, I don't care for Robert Pattinson OR Kristin Stewart in real life (your high and mighty attitudes about Twilight? Are not endearing. Take your mega checks with good grace or let them recast), but I was able to forget about their real life irritating-ness after a minute or two.

Also, did the guy who plays Mike get dramatically less good looking? I mean, I thought he was somewhat cute, in a pudgy faced way, in the last movie and in this one, I kept thinking, "Did they recast?!" 

I could talk on and on about the details, boring you all to tears, but you can all be grateful for Kayla, who will spare you that horror by allowing me to text her far into the night with my mindless neural firings.

I know that some people feel pretty pleased about not being Twilight fans, some even to the point of being superior about it, but I watch the movies and read the books and talk to other people who love them too and I'm glad to be a part of it. If you decide in ten years to give them a chance, you'll have missed out. It'll be over and you'll have missed it.

I watched Jacob's shy but insistent efforts to woo Bella and remember so clearly those same feelings from high school - the frustration, the hope, the disappointment, the almost right moment that disappears like it never happened. Say what you want about Stephenie Meyer's lousy writing, she's created some characters that ring pretty true to what teenage life is like.

Whoa, hello, sermonizing on about the goodness and truth of Twilight here. Clearly, I should not be allowed to stay up this late.

26 comments:

  1. I love everything about this post.

    And I want pictures of that tattoo.

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  2. Great post. When it comes to the movies I am team Jacob. He is a much better actor and I would much rather see him with his shirt off than Robert Pattinson. But the version of Edward in my head is so much better than the one in the movies, that when I read the books I am definitely team Edward :)

    New Moon was a great movie. So much better than Twilight.

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  3. Yay! I love you!! You said many of the things I chose not to try to articulate about the movie, but I actually agree with you completely - especially about the superiority complex of the non-fans. I was completely delighted - even with the parts that were bad. (Your post almost makes me want to rewrite my post because I'm afraid it comes off sounding more negative than I feel.) Anyway. It really was great, and I agree - Jacob was perfect.

    Also, I'm glad I'm not the only one with multiple Twilight posts. When I was putting up our New Moon guest post today and was finding posts about Twilight to show my solidarity, I was feeling like a really big dork, especially since I didn't put up all of them. But no. I am not ashamed of my posts, nor of my midnight viewings or book gettings, nor of my trips to Phoenix and Forks. They were fun and I stand by them. Hmph.

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  4. I go see it tomorrow and my expectations are very low because honestly, I think Twilight sort of blew....

    I have to say THANK YOU for agreeing that Robert Pattinson is just NOT Edward enough! Every once in a great while he can be attractive but really, there are wayyyy hotter guys out there that could've worked. Also, Kristen Stewart? CANNOT ACT. It drives me nuts. Every movie she's in, she's the SAME character. So annoying. And she's not cute enough for Bella-plain, yes, but it's just sort of a weird match for me.

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  5. I haven't seen the movie yet, but I liked your post. My guess is, I'll end up agreeing with you. Especially because, hello, Jacob is gorgeous and Bella clearly made the wrong choice.

    And seriously? What is with Rob and Kristin? They are so weird and dark and whiney in real life. Taylor always looks so fresh and so excited to be a part of everything... and he actually smiles. Who'd have thought?

    I wish someone would have called you about casting... I just do not see the appeal of Rob, at all. What am I missing?

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  6. You sound like maybe you are "Team Lautner" not team Jacob. This is a new team that my young women have come up with for those who just enjoy Taylor Lautner in all his splendor.

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  7. I hate to say that after book three I decided Stephani just sold out and went trashy. And I quit. No teenage mega romance for me. But even when I was a twilight fan, I hated (HATED) Jacob. Hello Ego of Jacob. I think he is the ultimate teenage jerk. I'm not saying Edward is the god everyone goes on about... but at least he's not as downright rude as Jacob.

    Hate to be the antagonist, but someone has to do it

    (Don't worry, you still have all my respect... even if I've lost yours!)

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  8. Oh man, you are my true soul sista!

    I saw it last night too and all of the things you have mentioned I have complained and raved about too.

    First, GET OUT THE RASOR! Why did they not shave Edward?????? No only was he hairy but he was weirdly hairy.

    Second, the only time I thought he was good looking was in his first scene walking from his car to see Bella. And the lipstick? Don't even get me started.

    Third, Jacob. WOOF! I was Team Jacob before walking into the theatre and every one I was with was shocked. I loved every scene with him in it. He made the movie for me. Absolutely.

    Last, I LOVE CHARLIE. Next to Jacob he was the best cast of all of them. He just so perfect.

    100 times better than the first. Loved it. Will see it again. Come with me to the dollar theatre.

    P.S I so wish you were there. I kept squeezing Meleah's arm, the poor thing.

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  9. I am SO WITH YOU!!! Robert Pattinson looks awful in the movie! I think I cringed when he took his shirt off. But man, that sexual tension with Bella and Jacob. Wow, he looked AMAZING! I told my husband that he had to start doing whatever workout he's on because I could use some of that at home.

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  10. I totally though they had recast Mike. He definitely wasn't as boy-next-door cute in this one. I am Team Jacob...I really disliked Edward in this one. All that being said, I'm pretty sure my favorite characters are Alice and Jasper.

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  11. Amen and Amen! And seriously the paragraph about the anti-twilight people was so dead on. That's the perfect way to answer to someone who says they don't do "bandwagons".

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  12. Clearly you should stay up late bc I love this post!

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  13. New Moon was so great! I absolutely loved it. And, I must agree with Ang. When I watch the movie, I want to be Team Jacob but when I read the books, I am totally Team Edward. Although, when I met Robert Pattinson in person, he was actually REALLY good looking. It just definitely doesn't translate well to screen and with the pale white skin and red lips. Oh well, what can you do? I was still very happy with how New Moon turned out.

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  14. i have totally softened up to seeing new moon now. i didn't want to because the acting was horrible in 1st one (all except for jacob, of course!) and i am team edward. i think jacob is better for her, but edward and bella's connection is just too too strong, you can't just tell her "but jacob is healthier for you".

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  15. I agree with CarlieJane. In the book, I hated Jacob (until Breaking Dawn). I viewed him as a bully. BUT I think Lautner was fabulous in the movie. Some of his scenes had such intensity that I felt for the character. The overall acting in the movie was better. New Moon was definitely an improvement over Twilight.

    As for the haters...too bad. You're missing a fun phenomenon that you can share with like minded friends and people. I had a wonderful time with my girlfriends planning for and watching the movie.

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  16. I am sickened by the fact that you were right and I completely converted to Team Jacob after seeing the movie. How horribly disappointing after being an Edward fan for nearly three years now.


    Anyway, I agree with everything you wrote. Dangit.

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  17. I'm still firmly footed in "Team Edward". Because more than the pleas of Jacob, I identify with giving up what is good for you for the sake of loving with every possible thing you have to give to someone. Especially to the point of self detriment.

    However, I have to say. When I was reading New Moon I just wanted Edward to come back. I didn't want Bella's heart distracted, I didn't want her to have the sun without Edward.

    Yet, this movie converted me there. Jacob translated to a human being for me, one that I can empathize with and adore and yes, even root for a teensy bit.

    The movie was an amazing translation of the book. I was literally astounded.

    And I'm going back Tuesday. I'll most likely spend a ton of money on this movie, but for once I'm happy to!

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  18. I'm just happy to say that my mental image of book Edward has not been tainted by ugly Robert Pattison. I'm wholeheartedly team Jacob in the movies, and probably will be more so after seeing movie #2. However, I remain Team Edward in the books.

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  19. Always was and always will be Team Jacob. My biggest reason why is because I think Bella and Edward have an incredibly unhealthy relationship. She and Jacob could totally have worked it out. I don't give Edward any credit for leaving to "give Bella a chance to live her life" or whatever crap he spouted. That seriously docks points in my book.

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  20. You know? I don't find Robert Pattinson unappealing. I think he's a dorky Englishman and he's scrawny and certainly not enough like the Edward we have in our imaginations but I think the casting there works. I honestly don't know who they could have cast as Edward that everyone would have approved of. And Taylor L. is beautiful but I'm still not a Jacob-the-character fan. I can't get past the imprinting stuff in Breaking Dawn. At. All. Sick and wrong.

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  21. I loved the movie, but am clearly in the minority (in this crowd) by saying I am still Team Edward. For shame. No, really.

    I did find Jacob to be a breath of fresh air and all that, and I have to say that Taylor Lautner made Jacob 100 zillion times more likeable (for me) in the movie than in the book. I will also admit that I may have clapped, or something, at a few pro-Jacob scenes. Don't hate me. :)

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  22. I had a really hard day on Saturday because I couldn't stop thinking about how stupid it was of Bella to leave warm, tan, muscular Jacob to chase after cold, pasty white, control-freak, personality-lacking Edward. It pretty much ruined my day... not that Bella deserves either of them... the little beast...

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  23. I love Jacob, but I just love Edward more. I love them both, but there's no choice. It was always Edward. I'm sorry, Jake, I have to go.

    As much as humanly possible, I avoid seeing, reading, or hearing anything about Kristen Stewart or Robert Pattinson. I don't like seeing them in real life, acting stupid, looking stupid. I hate seeing ads for them in other movies (DURING THE NEW MOON PREVIEWS, WHAT!) I like to think of them as Edward and Bella, not as people playing Edward and Bella. It makes it seem more real.

    I honestly think movie-Edward is perfect. The lipstick was a little much, and the white makeup a little heavy, but "Rob" is perfect. He is Edward, and I love him. (Edward, not "Rob".)

    Jessica also translates so well to the screen. I LOVE her in the movies.

    And for all the Twilight haters: whatever. So you don't read books for kids? Yeah, well I don't read gossip magazines. Or chick lit. We all have our vices, there is not one who subsists purely on CNN and the New York Times Business Section (and if there is... well, you must be very fun. congratulations). Some of us prefer YA fantasy to US Weekly. To each her own!

    Why, oh why, do all my Twilight friends live so far away? I want to see it many more times, and I just may have to go by myself.

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  24. I finally found someone to go with today and Aaron babysat. I loved it! I'm so glad that I joined the Twilight movement :) Did you notice how everyone's eyes were more vibrantly colored this time? I don't know that I liked that. Anyway, in the book I'm all about Jacob as well - but his face?! - he's SO young - and I thought he was supposed to be taller... anyway I hear the actor is only 17 so he's still growing... if only all movies would play out like we see them as we read.

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