Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead by Sheryl Sandberg

One thing I've come to realize recently about non-fiction is that I don't have to agree with everything the author says to really find a book interesting and worthwhile.

When I read Zero Waste Home, for instance, I wasn't suddenly about to shoot for one quart jar of trash per year. But I did find a lot of the ideas worthwhile and I loved seeing how one person lives their life.

Like Gretchen Rubin says, it's sometimes more useful to learn from one person's very specific experiences than broad generalizations.

Anyway, all that aside, you've probably heard of Sheryl Sandberg and Lean In long before this review of it. If you haven't, she is the Chief Operating Officer at Facebook (and made a whopping $845 million last year), and now become something of a spokesperson for equality for women in the workplace.

You won't be surprised to know that I sit on the boards of exactly no companies (billion dollar ones or otherwise), I haven't dressed up for work in three years, and my coworkers are more likely to spit chewed raisins into my hand than to offer me stock options (my mother is wondering why I even have raisins in my house. Okay, okay, I'm lying about the raisins. It's probably chewed cranberries).

And yet, I found this book totally fascinating and useful, both as a work-at-home mom and as a parent of two daughters.

The book is part memoir, part business advice. She talks about her own path, attending Harvard as an undergrad and realizing she was in WAY over her head, later getting an MBA and then landing in Silicon Valley, first with Google and then with Facebook.

There is also a lot of discussion about women in business, balancing responsibilities between spouses, finding mentors, and some of the differences between men and women that manifest themselves in the workplace. It is full of practical advice and inspiring ways of making the worlds of work and family better for men and women alike. I told Bart after I finished that anyone with any interest in business, male or female, ought to read this.

The chapter that I found perhaps the most fascinating was titled, "Don't Leave Before You Leave." She talks about how many women, assuming they will have children in the future, dial back on their careers from the beginning. They don't shoot for big projects, assignments, or promotions, worrying that they won't be able to manage it once they have children, even if they are still years away from having children. By the time they do have children, their jobs and careers are much less lucrative, interesting, and engaging than they might have been otherwise, and so the choice is not between staying home with children or a really great job, but between staying home and a somewhat mediocre career path.

Of course, you can't predict how your life is going to play out - if and when you'll get married or have children or what your financial situation will be - and so sometimes a job you assumed might only be for a year or two, ends up being something you do for a decade or more.  It seems to me that the more serious and ambitious you are about your career path, the more options will be available to you down the road.

I am really grateful that my parents were always very serious about encouraging us to pick degrees, careers, and jobs that we liked, that could support us financially, and that had some sort of upward trajectory and various options.

I also thought about if you choose a typically "family-friendly" job like teaching (which, after having worked in a school myself, I have my doubts about, but that's neither here nor there), you have intense competition from other people in similar situations. If you pursued, say, engineering and were as ambitious as possible during your full-time career, you're likely to be in a much smaller pool of people who have your skills and are interested in working part-time or on a contract basis if you decided you wanted to stay home with your children.

Hmm, four long paragraphs later.  . .

I really could write at length about every chapter in this book - I have lots to say about being equal partners in parenting and household responsibilities, about balancing work and motherhood (if you happen to have interest in that topic, I have loved reading Joanna Goddard's series of interviews with 15 different moms about how they make the two work - half of them work from home and half of them work outside the home), and the differences between how women view themselves and how men view themselves (the scenario she describes at Harvard's graduation speeches describes the difference between Bart and me to a T).

I think there are so many different ways to make your life work for you, regardless of your circumstances, and even though my life is just about as different from hers as you can imagine, I found section after section to relate directly to things I'm working on in my own life. If any of you have read this, I'd love to hear what you thought.

I like to read books that are getting huge amounts of publicity and it was fun to read this one after hearing her name and book mentioned so frequently in the last couple of months. Even better that I enjoyed it so much.

Copy checked out from my local library

Homemade Thin Mints

If someone had asked me two weeks ago to do a recipe on my blog using Ritz crackers, I would probably have responded with something totally snobby like, "Um, actually, I mainly focus on whole and unprocessed foods."

(You can see where this is going, right?).

Have a non-whole, processed recipe of happiness.

The night before Mother's Day, after a grocery store run, I found myself in possession of a box of Ritz crackers (I blame Bart). Also a bag of chocolate chips (I can only blame myself).

We threw the babies in bed, and ten minutes later, I was sticking two pans of knock-off Thin Mint cookies in the freezer to harden up.

This is why children think all the fun happens after they go to bed. Because it does.

We shared a few with Ella the next day. Just a very few.

Also, now that Ella has tasted Ritz crackers, I'm not sure there will be any going back (who am I kidding. Since I tasted them again, there will be no going back).

Homemade Thin Mints
(from Averie Cooks)

Makes about 2 dozen

1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
optional 1 Tablespoon shortening or coconut oil
3/4 teaspoon peppermint extract
2 dozen Ritz crackers


Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or a reusable liner. 

In a small saucepan, melt the chocolate chips (and the shortening or oil if you're using it - I think it just makes it a bit smoother, but you'll be fine if you leave it out too) over medium-low heat, stirring frequently.

When it's completely smooth, remove from heat, and add the peppermint extract 1/4 teaspoon at a time, tasting between additions to make sure it isn't too strong. My chocolate got all bubbly when I added each teaspoon, but a quick stir brought it back to normal.

Drop a Ritz cracker in the chocolate, then use a fork or spoon to flip it over to coat the other side. Lift it out the chocolate, shake slightly to remove excess chocolate, and place on the baking sheet.

When all of your crackers are chocolate covered, put the pans in the fridge or freezer to harden up the chocolate. After about 15 minutes or so, they'll be ready to eat!

(I like the taste of them out of the freezer better, but they look a little nicer out of the fridge the next day because the chocolate condensates in the freezer. You choose).

Note: After worrying endlessly about it, I made a second trip to the store to buy peppermint extract. I already had mint extract, but the more I smelled the bottle, the more I felt like it was going to give me a toothpaste taste, which wasn't exactly what I was going for. Play it safe and go with peppermint extract.

Sisters Share It All: One Store, Day and Night

I love Old Navy for many many reasons (it's close to me. It's inexpensive. There is a fake dog at the entrance which means Ella will happily go any time I want). When Landen suggested we do a little virtual shopping there, I was more than happy to oblige.

I've found that doing the 31 for 31 challenge has made me pretty picky about shopping, even when it's pretend shopping like this. I want items that work by themselves (so no sweaters as the weather gets ridiculously warm here), and also things I can comfortably wear during my daily life which mainly involves sitting at a computer, doing laundry and dishes, and reading stacks of picture books. It took me a while to pick out things that 1) had good reviews 2) were mostly on sale and 3) were things I'd actually wear in my real life.

Also, you might think, "That is a mighty casual date night outfit." Well, I'm a mighty casual girl. And also I live in Austin, where there is virtually no place you can't go in jeans. And I really love pants.

 

[Casual Outfit: Plaid shirt, white shorts, sandals]

[Date Night: Striped top, skinny gray zip pants, wedge sandals]

I had no intentions of actually buying anything, but then I saw these flat sandals and I've been looking for a pair like crazy. And. . .so I ordered them. My willpower is nothing if not astounding. (Shoes? Always my weakness).

(By the way, are you familiar with Ebates? If you sign up for a free account, and then go to a store's website through the Ebates site, you get a percentage of your purchase total back. They have tons and tons of stores that participate, and I've been using it for years. It is one of my favorite things in the world. Right now, you get 14% back from Old Navy (plus $5, if you're new to Ebates), so if you decide you absolutely must purchase something from Old Navy today, it'd definitely be in your best interest to sign up. Totally helped me justify my sandal purchase. And thus ends my public service announcement for the day).


Merrick and Landen probably picked out much more awesome outfits. Check out their posts:

6 Recipes You Should Try (I Mean, If You Want To)

If this particular list looks a bit heavy on the snack-y type recipes, you might correctly surmise that I was doing a lot of these while Bart was in the middle of busy season and I had many many nights home alone while small children slept. The peanut butter pretzel truffles are rather hard to explain away as non-desserts, but the cookie dough blizzard and truffle squares? Legitimately non-desserts. At least in my book.

1. Sun-Dried Tomato and Spinach Omelet: I have spent most of my life disliking eggs, but the older I get, the more I seem to like them. And this was the best omelet I've ever had. Even Ella, who also is not much of an egg eater, scarfed down the tiny square I gave her and asked for me. I gave her a little more, but it was a sacrifice on my part. I was wary of the balsamic drizzle on top, but I put my faith in Natalie, and it was not a mistake.

2. Strawberry Balsamic and Bacon Pizza: We had people over for dinner so I needed to make two pizzas instead of the usual one, which gave me an excuse to make one of those pizzas a weird one. And whoa, this pizza was insanely good. The sauce is a balsamic reduction mixed with strawberry jam - I could have eaten it plain. Bart, who tends to worry about these kinds of unusual combinations, gave it high marks.

3. Pretzel and Peanut Butter Truffles: I do not care for pretzels plain very much, but put them in a recipe and I'm hard pressed to resist. I just dipped the tops of these in chocolate so they were much less cute, but also much easier. And you know me. . . I like easy.

4. Nutty Cinnamon Chocolate Truffle Squares: I made these about five times in the last month (although after the first time, I stopped doing the bottom layer of chocolate because it was too sweet for me and also it kept cracking off. Easier and better to just do a top chocolate layer. I use cashews instead of pecans, and I try not to eat the whole pan myself.

5. Roasted Pear and Chocolate Chunk Scones: Another scone recipe. Seriously, these are the best scones ever. (Also, have you noticed I like chocolate?).

6. No-Bake Dairy & Sugar-free Cookie Dough Blizzard: For many moons, we've been using our frozen bananas to make that two-ingredient "ice cream" but this is now my preferred method for using up the frozen bananas (let's not lie - I overbuy bananas just so I never run out of frozen ones). I use vanilla almond milk and instead of bothering with making double layer cookie balls, I just throw together a quick batch of these, roll them into tiny balls, and freeze them for about five minutes.

I read over this list and feel like I am very lazy about any fussy steps in a recipe. Happily, that laziness seems to result in eating less chocolate. So maybe laziness is a quality I should continue to cultivate.

P.S. Here are previous recipes I've tried and loved.

A Whirlwind Weekend in Nashville

1. I'd take you out for an early (they open at 6 a.m.) breakfast at The Pancake Pantry. You can order whatever you want, but I'd strongly recommend the sweet potato pancakes with cinnamon syrup.  They are the most delicious pancakes I've ever had, which is saying something, because I don't even like pancakes.  Plus, with a vegetable in the name, you almost feel healthy eating it.    

2. It's famous for a reason! You shouldn't miss The Hermitage, President Andrew Jackson's former home.  Most of the original decor in the home has been preserved, making it an authentic period museum.  An audio-tour is included in the price of admission, so you'll be able to take the tour of the home and gardens at your own pace.  It's a perfect antebellum experience and the whole time I felt like I had stepped into "Gone With the Wind.".

3. Calories don't count on vacation, so we'll stop in and grab a treat at The Cupcake Collection.  There are seven daily flavors, as well as rotating flavors.  Their frosting is to die for and doesn't taste artificial like some frosting.  The sweet potato cupcake is my favorite (do you sense a theme?) and the price won't bust your wallet - these tasty treats are only $1.50 apiece, which means you can have like a dozen.  While we're in the Germantown area, we can stop a few doors down at Monell's for a true Southern meal.  Served family style, you are always guaranteed their famous finger-licking fried chicken and buttery biscuits, as well as other traditional favorites.  

4. The weather is perfect and getting outdoors is a must. We'll take advantage of the gorgeous day at Cheekwood Botanical Gardens.  You can enjoy a picnic while meditating in the Japanese Garden, peruse the art on the Sculpture Trail while getting in a little exercise (to burn off all the yummy food you've eaten), or inhale the aroma of fresh herbs in the Herb Garden.

5. You're so fortunate to have an Music City insider showing you around. The locals would stone me if I didn't show you The Bluebird Cafe.  This hole-in-the-wall performance venue is where Garth Brooks was discovered and where other songwriters/artists got their start.  The cozy setting is very intimate; with such a small space, any seat has basically a front-row view.  There are two shows a night, usually highlighting 3-4 songwriters, so both early-risers and night owls can enjoy this experience.  
 
6. You didn't ask, but I'll tell you anyway that a trip to Nashville wouldn't be complete without visiting the Opryland Hotel and Grand Ole' Opry.  The hotel boasts a 4.5 acre indoor garden, complete with a riverboat tour,  that surrounds all of the shops and restaurants inside the hotel.  Each night there are fountain shows set to various songs and the massive atrium adds an additional element of awe.  The Opry is the world's longest-running live radio broadcast that showcases iconic country music stars. Performers belong to an elite membership, so you will always only see top-notch performances.  

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